This Is How I Lied Page 12

  NOLA KNOX

  Tuesday, June 16, 2020

  Nola woke to the muffled alarm from her cell phone and rose stiffly from the sofa’s lumpy cushions where she’d fallen asleep. The night before, Nola kept walking up and down the basement steps to check on the boxes hidden beneath the stairs, trying to determine whether or not they looked out of place among the other mildewed cardboard boxes and broken rattan furniture.

  Around one in the morning she pushed the mountain of clothes from the sofa to the floor and tried to rest but with little luck. She kept thinking she could hear the scritch-scratch of rodents in the walls and wondered if there might be more in the basement.

  The ringing continued and Nola found her phone buried beneath the pile of clothes and silenced it. There were dozens of missed calls from her mother’s number. She couldn’t put it off any longer; she needed to go to the hospital and talk to Charlotte about Eve’s case.

  Nola called the vet clinic to let them know that she wouldn’t be coming into work today. That she would come into the clinic tomorrow but then wouldn’t be in for the remainder of the week, that she needed to spend time with her mother. Nola hadn’t missed a day of work in ten years. The last time being when she received a nasty bite to the arm. She had been in too much of a hurry, too careless and it cost her a trip to the emergency room to get cleaned up and be prescribed some antibiotics. Good thing the ER was busy and the physician didn’t ask too many questions.

  Nola moved to the kitchen and blearily poured herself a cup of coffee from the automatic coffee maker. Sipping the hot liquid, she opened the front door and stepped outside. The warm air was still and thick with moisture, the sky a hazy blue.

  Nola felt someone’s eyes on her and looked around to find Colin Kennedy standing on his front porch, cigarette and coffee cup in hand, watching. Colin, Maggie’s older brother, had always been an enigma to Nola. She remembered him being so different than his pretty, popular sister and his big strong police chief dad. He was a common sight riding around town on his skateboard wearing his flannel shirt and cargo pants. He was brooding, quiet and dumb as a box of rocks. Or, Nola thought, that was what he wanted people to think.

  A screen door slammed and Henry Kennedy stepped out onto the porch to join his son. Nola hadn’t seen him in a long time. She left for work early in the morning and often didn’t return until late evening.

  Nola remembered Henry exuding confidence and authority, but now he was stooped and frail looking. Puzzled, Henry stared at Nola for a long time as if trying to place her. She had heard that he had memory issues. What would that be like, Nola wondered, to gradually forget all that you’ve ever known? She had the opposite problem. She never forgot a thing she read, heard or saw.

  Henry leaned close to his son and spoke into his ear. Colin nodded and lifted his coffee cup toward Nola in a greeting. She didn’t wave back. Henry shuffled back inside the house with Colin close behind. Nola wondered if they were talking about her.

  Across the street, Joyce Harper dragged her garbage cans out to the end of the driveway, the plastic wheels clacking against the concrete, and nearly tripped when she spotted Nola.

  Her eyes lingered on Nola’s face, probably wondering why Nola was still at home at this hour. Or, Nola thought, Cam had told Joyce about their little conversation the night before, but Nola doubted it. The last thing Cam Harper would want is his wife to know about his proclivities. Joyce quickly placed the garbage can on the curb and rushed back into the house without saying a word. Nola had to smile. Joyce was clearly nervous around her, perhaps even afraid.

  Or maybe Joyce’s nervousness had nothing to do with Nola at all. After all, Joyce Knox lived with her own kind of monster.

  Nola glanced down at her watch. Eight o’clock. Normally she would be on her way to do her herd health rounds, visiting dairy farms, performing pregnancy checks on cows and looking in on the new calves. Now the entire day stretched out in front of her like a black void. She was restless, jumpy.

  Nola thought of Charlotte, sitting in the hospital in Willow Creek, probably waiting for her to call, to come visit. Nola sighed. She would go see her mother and combine the visit with her other errands. It was time.

  Nola made the drive to Willow Creek and the hospital in twenty minutes. After Eve died and Nola was expelled from Grotto High for pushing Nick Brady into a glass trophy case, her mother enrolled her in Sacred Heart, the Catholic high school in Willow Creek, a pretty college town with acres of woods and hiking trails nearby. Sacred Heart was better than Grotto High, Nola thought, but not by much.

  Nola moved through the halls of Sacred Heart in a fog, attending classes but not paying attention, not interacting with her new classmates. What she really wanted was to graduate early but her mother refused to even consider the idea. You can’t leave me too, she cried. Not yet.

  Nola drove by a handful of farms that she had visited many times. She passed the Ransom County Fairgrounds where 4-H kids showed their pigs and calves and rabbits each summer at the fair. As she sped down the highway she passed a hand-painted sign for O’Keefe Orchards & Landscaping and wondered if Maggie had slept as poorly as she had that night. Together they had found Eve sprawled out across the cave floor, eyes open wide, staring up at them. It was a terrifying sight. One that Nola relived often, mostly at night under the cover of darkness. She imagined that Maggie did the same.

  Nola came into Willow Creek and drove directly into the hospital lot and let the engine idle. Having her mother out of the house the past few weeks was freeing. She felt like she could breathe again. She could pull out her display boxes and examine the contents and she could add to her collections without having to worry about Charlotte barging into her room or yelling down the basement stairs complaining about the odd smells. Turning off the ignition, Nola was confident as to what she needed to do next. It was for her mother’s own good.

  Leaving the cool air of the truck, she advanced through the half-filled parking lot, the hot sun beating down on her scalp, and pushed through the hospital entrance. Once inside she found the elevator that would take her to the skilled care floor.

  Nola tapped on the door of 318 and a creaky voice told her to come in. Her mother was sitting up in her hospital bed, one arm in a cast; her long ash-gray hair hung in stringy hanks against her shoulders.

  “Nola?” Charlotte wheezed. “Where the hell have you been? You haven’t been back to see me since the surgery.” Charlotte’s face, pale and puffy, was strained with pain and fatigue. “I saw the news. Are they really looking into Eve’s murder again?”

  “Hi, Charlotte,” Nola said.

  “She’s always called me Charlotte,” her mother said. “Ever since she could talk. It was never mommy or mom or mama. Always Charlotte.”

  Nola looked around, unsure who her mother was talking to but then a young man dressed in yellow scrubs stepped from the bathroom. He pulled the latex gloves from his hands, tossed them into a nearby wastebasket and smiled.

  “I’m Ray, your mom’s nurse,” he said. “It’s nice to meet you.”

  Nola gave the man a nod and turned back to her mother.

  “I tried to call you. Why didn’t you call me back?” Charlotte shifted in her bed and winced.

  “I’ll let you two catch up. Holler if you need anything,” Ray said and left the room.

  “I didn’t realize that it would be on the news and I wanted to tell you in person.” Nola peered at the label on the nearly empty IV bag connected to Charlotte. “They’re giving you morphine? Strong stuff.”

  “I am in pain,” Charlotte said tremulously. “You have no idea how bad my hip hurts. Not that you care. What evidence did they find?” she asked. “And why is that Kennedy girl in charge?”

  “Some kids found Eve’s boot in the cave and I don’t know why Maggie’s the one in charge. I thought it was strange too,” Nola tried to pull Charlotte’s sheet back from
her legs but Charlotte held tight. “I just want to see the incision,” Nola explained, releasing the linens. “See if your surgeon is as good as I am.”

  “It’s not right,” Charlotte said, bringing a cup to her mouth and tipping it back. Water dribbled down the corners of her mouth. “I don’t think that’s a good thing at all. I gave Henry the benefit of the doubt for years and what do we have to show for it? No.” She shook her head. “The Kennedy family had their chance.”

  “That’s what I said.” Nola plucked a tissue from the box on the windowsill and handed it to Charlotte. “Maggie Kennedy isn’t the most impartial person to investigate. She’s too close to the case.”

  “If they would have only listened to me, they would have solved it a long time ago.” Charlotte dabbed at her face with the tissue. “I’m just worried that Maggie Kennedy will go down the same dead ends that her dad did.”

  “We all know who you think killed Eve,” Nola said distractedly, looking out the window. “Too bad there was never enough evidence to prove it.”

  Charlotte sniffed. “Nick Brady killed Eve and I’ll go to my grave saying so. When I get home, I want to talk to Maggie Kennedy. I want to tell her that they can’t let him go this time. The doctor said I will probably be able to come home by the end of the week.”

  “Charlotte, that’s not going to happen,” Nola said as she glanced behind her to see if anyone could hear her.

  “What?” Charlotte asked in confusion. “But the doctors said...”

  “It’s the house,” Nola said eager to get this conversation over with. “They’ll never let you come home to it the way it is now.”

  “But how will they know?” Charlotte’s voice cracked. “You aren’t going to say anything, are you?”

  Nola didn’t respond.

  “Nola, you’re not going to tell the doctors I shouldn’t come home, are you?” Charlotte asked fearfully. “You can’t do this to me.”

  “It’s for your own good,” Nola said, keeping her voice neutral, calm.

  “You’ve never done anything unless it was for your own good,” Charlotte shot back. “The only person you care about is yourself. I’ll tell them you pushed me down the steps. I swear I will.”

  “You know that’s not true, Charlotte. I was trying to help you and you tripped. Why in the world would I push you?”

  “You’ve always hated me. You hated your sister and you hate me. You want me out of the way.”

  “That’s not true.” Nola went to the small closet in the corner of the room and pulled out a pillow and walked back toward Charlotte. “I loved Eve and why would I have stayed with you all these years if I didn’t care about you? You look uncomfortable,” Nola said as she slid the pillow behind Charlotte’s head. “If you tell them that, there’s no way they will ever let you come home.” Nola spoke in a low, soothing voice. “You would be put in an old folks’ home. Let me get things organized for you. Then you can come home,” Nola said as she looked to the doorway. “I’ve got to go now, Charlotte. You get some rest now. I’ll call you later.”

  “You’re lying! You always lie. I can’t stay here.” Charlotte’s eyes widened with fear. “Don’t leave me here, Nola. Don’t you dare leave me here. I’ll tell them you weren’t there with me until six on the day Eve died.”

  “You can’t say that, Charlotte.” Nola sighed. “That will just make it all the harder to prove that Nick was the one who killed Eve.”

  “I don’t want you throwing away my things.” Charlotte was shouting now. “They’re important to me. They’re all I have! Nola, don’t leave me here!”

  Nola stepped from the room, meeting Ray as she moved down the hallway, her mother’s cries following her. “Is everything okay?” Ray asked. “Did something happen?”

  “She’ll be okay,” Nola answered as she breezed past him. “She’ll be just fine.”

  Nola hurried back to her truck but she took her time heading back to Grotto, taking back roads and country lanes, swiveling her head from side to side looking for any movement in the ditches that hugged the road. She was getting that urge again.

  Her mother would forgive her. She always did. Nola just needed her mother out of the way for the time being and, well, if it turned into a permanent thing, that was okay too. Her mother would thank her in the end, especially if it meant the downfall of Nick Brady.

  The rustle of tall grass and a sleek striped tail caught her eye and she pulled over to the side of the road. Poor thing was scrawny and flea-bitten. If Nola didn’t step in, it would probably die a long and painful death. She reached into her bag and retrieved the can, a snare pole and a thick pair of work gloves. No need to get scratched up.

  Nola stepped from the truck. Black gnats swirled around her head and she waved them away only to have them disperse and quickly return. She popped the lid on the tin of cat food and set it near where she saw the tabby, took five steps backward and with the snare pole in hand, crouched down and waited.

  Therapy Transcript

  Client Name: Nola Knox, 13 years

  Therapist Name: Linda Gonzalez, LMHC, NCC

  Date of Service: Feb. 13, 1996

  L. Gonzalez: How was your first month at your new school?

  N. Knox: It was okay. Pretty much everyone ignored me.

  L. Gonzalez: What are your classes like? Do you have a favorite?

  N. Knox: They’re too easy. I can already tell. I just sit in the back and read my own book and keep my mouth shut.

  L. Gonzalez: What would happen if you told your teachers that the work was too easy? What do you think they would say?

  N. Knox: They already know it is. They know I’m smarter than they’ll ever be. It’s just easier if I work on my own things. They leave me alone and they don’t look stupid.

  L. Gonzalez: What are you working on?

  N. Knox: Have you heard of Alec Jeffreys?

  L. Gonzalez: I can’t say that I have. Tell me about him.

  N. Knox: He knew he wanted to be a scientist since before he was even eight years old. His dad bought him a chemistry set and he liked to do experiments. Blow things up. When he was around my age he found a dead cat. He brought it home and dissected it on his dining room table. He was curious, you know, about what was inside. But his parents got mad at him for bringing a dead cat into the house. It smelled bad. But it paid off. Eventually he discovered DNA fingerprinting.

  L. Gonzalez: You like learning about scientists?

  N. Knox: I want to be a scientist. A veterinarian—a really good one. I feel like there’s all this information out there but because I’m only thirteen I can’t get my hands on it. It’s not fair. I could be this amazing scientist but I’m stuck here, in the middle of nowhere.

  L. Gonzalez: You feel like you’re missing out because you are in middle school?

  N. Knox: Yeah. I’m smart enough to be in college but no one cares.

  L. Gonzalez: Have they talked about grade level acceleration with you?

  N. Knox: Yeah, but they always say that I’m not socially ready to be moved ahead. So I’m stuck.

  L. Gonzalez: What would make you un-stuck?

  N. Knox: If I could get out of Grotto, go to college.

  L. Gonzalez: Wouldn’t you miss your mother? Your friends?

  N. Knox: My mom misses Eve. I don’t even think she would know I was gone.

  L. Gonzalez: Why do you think that?

  N. Knox: Because all she does is cry and say how much she misses Eve. It’s pretty obvious. Do you think it was okay, what Alex Jeffreys did?

  L. Gonzalez: Dissecting the cat? What do you think?

  N. Knox: I think that it’s the only way to learn. Really learn. If you don’t get in there, cut through the skin and muscle and tendons, hold the heart in your hand, how can you really understand? If you don’t understand how things die how can you understand how they
live?

  EVE KNOX

  Friday, December 22, 1995

  8:10 a.m.

  Mr. Orso barely looked at Eve when she slunk into class ten minutes late. He handed her a copy of the semester test and went back to sipping his coffee.

  Eve stared down at the exam and dread filled her chest. The confrontation between Nick and Mr. Harper kept running through her head. She was mortified that Mr. Harper knew that Nick was abusing her and she couldn’t believe that Nick accused her of having sex with Mr. Harper. How was she going to face either of them?

  Nick never meant to hurt her, he just got so mad sometimes. And in the beginning, she had to admit, she liked the way he hovered over her, the way he wrapped an arm around her like he owned her. No one ever loved her in that way.

  Tears blurred her vision. She swiped them away with her fingers and tried to focus on the exam.

  1. A phrase that uses ambiguity in service of rhetorical humor is which of the following rhetorical devices?

  A. Pun

  B. Metonymy

  C. Synecdoche

  D. Zeugma

  E. Alliteration

  Eve should have known the answer to this. Last week she would have known the answer, but her head was muddled and confused and it didn’t help that Nick was sitting a few rows behind her staring daggers into her back. Eve circled letter B. Metonymy. “Hey,” Eve heard and turned her head. The girl behind her shoved a folded piece of notebook paper at her. Eve looked back at Nick who was staring intently at her. Mr. Orso, oblivious, was bent over a stack of essays. Eve quickly snatched the note and covertly slid it beneath her exam.

  She just needed to push Nick, Mr. Harper and her mother and Nola and even Maggie out of her mind. English was her best subject and she didn’t plan on blowing the chance for her one and only A because she had a bad few days.

  A sharp poke to the back made Eve sit upright and again she spun around. The girl behind her gave her an exasperated look and held out another piece of paper. Eve wanted to ignore the offering but she knew Nick too well. He’d keep writing and passing notes until she was buried in them. She took the note and slid it beneath her test paper along with the first.